Let's face it, Korean Moms are obsessed with death and dying. Not just any kind of death and dying, but the kind you wish you could witness. Have you ever heard your Korean Mom tell you not to turn on the electric fan in your room with the door closed or you will suffocate? They will say this to you, not in their gentle soothing voice (whatever that sounds like...), but they will scream it at you in their super sonic Korean Mom voice which only wild animals and ghosts can hear. As if you were secretly planning on dying this way, and she found you out. It almost makes you want to try it just to escape the piercing sound. Almost.
Korean Moms are a walking advertisement for 'Do not attempt this at home'. They will hammer amazing ways to die into your head even as a little kid. They have single handidly raised an entire generation of people with secret phobias. I admit that I am currently afraid of whistling at night. My Korean Mom told me that if I do this, thieves will rob me blind...hence, I now only whistle before noon.
Death is the consequence of choice for a Korean Mom. If she wants to teach you a lesson, or keep you away from something, she will tell you that it will kill you. Not that it will give you cavities, or ruin your moral character. No. She will flat out tell you that you will die. Some Moms informatively tell you to look both ways before crossing the street. Korean Moms don't hold back. They tell it like it is. If you do that...you're gonna die beyotch. According to my Korean Mom I should have already died several times over from Fan Death, eating too much Shin Ramyun, picking my nose, and talking back. Once, my Korean Mom told me that if I drink too much Coke-a-Cola, my skin would turn black...the equivalent of death to a Korean Mom.
-Kudos to Anonymous for the idea!
ps- Good to be home! Thanks for all the times I peed a little reading your comments. This is like free group therapy.